“I Do Not Have Any Choice”

by Arnold De Villa
May 1, 2013
We all have pet peeves. Mine is the one that poses itself as a dead ended excuse, a cul-de-sac, and a blocked response. It goes like this: Question: “Why did you come into this situation?” Answer: “I do not have a choice”. Question: “Is there anything else that you could do?” Response: “I do not have any choice”. Question: “Why did you have to pay so much?” Answer: “I have no other choice”. It goes like a pit – ad infinitum, ad libidem and ad nauseam.
When problems arise within a restricted time and that time demands an immediate reaction, it is highly probable that we would err. Mistakes are human. We try again. Yet as mistakes form part of our imperfect human condition, so does reason. In every course of action we take (deliberate, spontaneous or planned), there is a rationale that is either recognized, unknown, concealed or rejected. As human beings endowed with a mind, it is our task to discern the why behind the how and the end beyond the what. Unfortunately, as is the cause of so many tragedies, due to the lurking indolence we have within, spiked by sloth and a tendency for ease and convenience, we are so inclined to react without thinking, respond without reasoning, and exist without the deepest appreciation for human life. So we come up with the classic excuse, “I do not have any choice”.
“I do not have any choice”. Allow me to be blatant. “Wrong. You do have a choice”. You have a choice to do or not to do, to keep or to lose, to work or not to work, to shop or to save. You have a choice to defer or to act now, to go or to remain, to leave or to stay. You also have a choice to choose among so many choices or to confront one single choice. And you even have a choice to live, to survive, to thrive or to be miserable. Indeed, the choice is yours.
As we pass through cross roads of ethical dilemmas, professional offerings, multiple choices and daily challenges, the spice of life is rooted upon our ability to fully execute our free will, apply our liberties and bask within our own volition. When we claim victory, liability or accountability from the aftermath of our behavior and corresponding action, we then could bask above or atop the summit of our own humanity and claim ownership for our own lives.
Choices are not always tangible. We do not have always a wide selection of size, color, flavor or shape. Besides the relative capacity of a “Double C” or an extra small, colors come in different shades and flavors could be presented as vague as they smell. And when we are left with nothing else except for that one thing we need, it is still not true that we are left without a choice. We still have a choice to forego the need or to defer the possession of that need. And even if that need were a question of life or death, and reason told us to choose life, it does not mean that we could not have chosen death. The issue is choosing and not the quality of the choice. Imagine every nerve of your body being shattered, and you are completely dependent upon devices to survive. At that point, although it seems you are hapless and truly do not have a choice, deep within, you still have options for adopting an attitude that could either be appropriate, improper or inappropriate. You can choose to accept or to reject. You can choose to deny or to submit. The choices do not end.
An attitude is a reflection of what we value, perceive or opt to live life. It is the last choice that our rational minds can offer when trapped within a cul-de-sac or a stale-mated dilemma. In instances of self-defense, for example, when we are forced to destroy as a secondary consequence of self-preservation, when our impulse dictates that we have to obliterate what lies ahead lest we terminate our own, the choice that will confront us will then suspend between the will to live and the unwillingness to survive. In the end, our instinct will still be governed by internal options innate to our human existence.
It is this attitude that ultimately defines how we respond towards the plethora of life choices, seemingly scarce or apparently abundant. So where do you stand? Do you think you have a choice or are you still convinced that you don’t? Or as so many would say, “That all depends”. That all depends on what? So then we go back, it all depends on your attitude, that human disposition to practice reason or to forego it and behave like a gizmo.
Our attitudes, as Mr. Rich Wilkins said: “Can be used to build us up or put us down – the choice is ours. It also gives us the wisdom to know that we can’t change events of the past”. Like him, I too am convinced that life is 10% of what happens to us and 90% of how we respond to it. And how we respond to it entails everything about choices.
We do have choices. You have options. Take them away and we immediately enslave ourselves into the misery of a despondent limitation. In God’s ultimate wisdom, He has blessed is with an ability to choose an inner disposition, tantamount to a quasi-eternal ability of endless freedom. And that is why the likes of Victor Frankl and others who passed through the most despicable predicament survived the most atrocious conditions.
We do have choices. They may not be the best, the most desired or the most beneficial. Yet they are choices. And when external choices present us with dire realities, we still have internal options that no one can take except our ability to practice human freedom. We are enslaved by our own slavery, bound by our own bonds, trapped by the misperception that our human ability is limited to what we can have or to what we can do.
The most recent event in Boston is a challenge to our understanding in as much as we are perplexed by the senseless gang related shootings in Chicago, the massive killings of demented individuals, and other illogical behavior committed by our fellowmen. Meanwhile, as we move through the most mundane rituals of our daily milieu we will be confronted by profound and shallow choices, hallow options and trivial matters. Please, if you can, and I hope you can, never ever say “I do not have a choice” again. Although some people will recommend that we never say never, it is merely an intent and an intent is better than never. After all, “never” does not belong to our corruptible time. Neither does always. Yet between those two is our human version of quasi-infinity. We can while we can until reality imposes that we cannot. And when the moment comes that we truly can’t, we can then admit, accept, or deny that we have done our best or we have not done at all. So in the end, the choice is still ours. We DO HAVE a CHOICE.