Cabanatuan City: Thank you for the Lessons and the Blessings (Part 2)

by Carmelita Cochingco Ballesteros.
February 1, 2013
Everything that happens to you is your teacher. The secret is to sit at the feet of your own life and be taught by it. Everything that happens is either a blessing that is also a lesson, or a lesson that is also a blessing. (Berends, 1993)
Dear readers,
In Part 1 of this article, I wrote that as a senior citizen, I feel the urgency to review my life, learn its lessons, and thank persons whose love and kindness have made a huge difference in my life. I wrote about my childhood and high school life. Here’s Part 2.
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Higher Education. Araullo Lyceum, now Araullo University, was my collegiate home. It helped me hone my speaking and writing competence through the Speech and Debate Club and the student publication. I am delighted that the name Sandigan of the student publication has endured until now. It was chosen by the editorial staff which I headed in 1971-72.
I earned my bachelor’s degree, major in Political Science, and my master’s degree, major in English, in 1972 and 1975, respectively, from Araullo Lyceum. Thank you, Araullo!
A part-time student and full-time teacher, I completed my Ph.D. in English, major in Literature, at the University of Santo Tomas in 1991. My doctoral dissertation is the English Translation and Interpretation of Valeriano Hernandez y Peña’s novel, Mag-inang Mahirap.
Being an undergrad political science major, I have always been interested in leadership and management. Thus, I enrolled in the doctoral program, major in Educational Management, at De La Salle University-Manila from 1991 to 1999. I completed the academic requirements, but I did not write a dissertation.
Marriage & Family. My marriage to the late Amando V. Ballesteros III lasted less than three years. (He passed away in 2010, but we had been separated since 1975.) He left our young son and me for the usual reasons. I remained ‘single’ and raised my son with plenty of help from my parents, brothers and sisters, extended family, and friends.
During that turbulent time in my life, I met Mrs. Josefina L. Mojica and her family. They gave my toddler son and me the rudder that we needed to stay afloat. Mommy Mojica did the ordinary things which neighbors usually did.
She and her family spent time playing and talking with my little boy. She gave my son and me a share of whatever dish she cooked. She told funny stories, cracked jokes, and made me laugh. She listened to my stories about my students. She read the books I read and we discussed them with great passion.
She took good care of her husband and children. She helped take care of another neighbor who was dying slowly from cancer. She nurtured our quasi-parish and took care of our small chapel.
Through it all, I learned love and kindness from her. I learned the healing value of laughter, mutual acceptance, charity, and faith. She never talked about God, religion, or spirituality. All she did was show me God’s face through the love and kindness which she radiated. Thank you, Mommy!
Since the death of our mother in 1994, the home of my brother Toto and sister-in-law Luz in Nasugbu, Batangas has served as the port of call for my siblings and extended family members whenever special occasions draw us back to our hometown.
Always warm and generous, their hospitality is as steadfast and enthusiastic as the crowing of roosters at the crack of dawn. When I launched my language and education consultancy in April 2012, they gave me a big lift in more ways than one.
Whenever I’d feel as if the world were oppressing me, they’d listen to my litany of woes, then crack jokes to make me laugh or tell me more horrible stories which expose my woes as trivial matters. Thank you, Toto and Luz!
My sister Carol and brother-in-law Jun have always been pillars of support for my son and me as well as other family members. Carol and Jun are able to love, or choose to love, in the most difficult circumstances.
Their house is always open to family and friends. Their table is always laden with food cooked with affection. They’re always ready to listen and empathize. They’re always ready to roll up their sleeves and help in whatever way they can.
They don’t draw a line beyond which they would stop loving. They don’t distinguish between the lovable and the unlovable. If one happens to offend them, they are quick to forgive again and again.
From which fountain do they draw love, patience, and forgiveness? If I knew where that fountain was, I’d certainly draw some love, patience, and forgiveness for myself. Thank you, Carol and Jun!
With plenty of help from Above, my son Amando IV grew up a decent person with an upright character. He is married to the former Ezra Vizcarra and they have two children. His 11-year old son describes him as, “the man I love, my Dad.” Gentle and patient, he has a sense of humor, can tell stories well, and can speak impromptu with wit and depth. He’s a very good negotiator and problem-solver.
Mothering or parenting doesn’t stop when one’s child becomes a parent, too. Because of my failing grade in Sociology 1 (Love and Marriage), I have been committed to helping my son and his wife nurture a strong marriage and family life. One of the reasons I became an OFW for 10 ½ years was to give them the space they needed to become a couple.
In my sunset years, it is my son and his family who nurture me. I live with them and I tutor my grandkids with their schoolwork. However, as all digital-immigrants know, my digital-native grandkids tutor me in the ways of technology. Thank you, anak!
Professional Life.
Teaching. I had planned to become a lawyer, but after completing my bachelor’s degree in Political Science at Araullo Lyceum, the Dean of Instruction offered me a full-time teaching position at the College of Liberal Arts. And so I became a teacher and have remained a teacher all my life.
Writing. I write because I cannot sing, dance, or play a musical instrument. I was editor in chief of The Granary, the campus paper of Nueva Ecija High School, in 1967-1968. I was also editor in chief of the Sandigan, campus paper of Araullo University, in 1971-1972.
In the 1980s, I published with REX Book Store the Spoken English for Filipinos series (Prep to Grade 6 and Year I-IV). The series was revised in the 1990s and a third edition was published in 2000-2001. Today, it is always a pleasant surprise for me when a stranger recognizes me and tells me he or she has used my Spoken English book either as a student or as a teacher.
Taiwan and Singapore. I worked as an OFW for 10 ½ years. I taught at Da-Yeh University in Taiwan from 2000-2006, worked as a language specialist at the Regional Language Centre (RELC) in Singapore from 2006-2007, then taught at the National Insti-tute of Education (NIE), Nanyang Technological University, also in Singapore, from 2007-2010.
Blessed Teresa Language and Education Consultancy Services. When I came home for good on December 19, 2010, I was given a one-year appointment as an Associate Professor at the Department of English and Applied Linguistics, De La Salle University-Manila.
When I turned 60, I organized my own consultancy outfit anchored on language and education. I launched it with a modestly successful summer program on speech proficiency and academic writing in my hometown in 2012.
Right now, I am focusing on spiritual literacy with the Children’s Rosary Learning Jour